Nehemiah Challenge - Day One

I started this challenge for my church family as we faced an internal trial but I think that some of you might be inspired by it as well. So...welcome to the Nehemiah Challenge!

We are at the foot of a mountain. We have a choice. We can stand here, at the base, crying over what has happened. "Why me? Why us? Why now?" Or we can clothe ourselves in the full armor of God and trust Him as we start to climb.

I would like to ask you all to join me in what I am going to call the Nehemiah Challenge.

In the book of Nehemiah God proves Himself to be the Rebuilder of broken walls and broken lives. We need the God of Nehemiah to move now in our midst. Only then will we be able to climb this mountain and stand at the top, stronger than ever.

Join me today by reading Chapter 1 of the book of Nehemiah. As you read this chapter you will learn that Nehemiah learned of the sad state of Jerusalem and he spent days weeping and praying before God, grieving for what had transpired. Our grief, in the midst of this disappointment, is Biblical and expected. But Nehemiah turned his grief into earnest supplication to God.

Let us now follow his example, turn our hearts to God, repent for our own sin and our complacency.

We do not serve one man. We serve the one true God! We serve the King of kings and the Lord of lords. Remember that this is the time to work together for the kingdom of God to advance.

God have mercy on us and be glorified now within us.

The Nehemiah Challenge continues tomorrow with Chapter 2. Let's work together and watch God rebuild!

Your friend and servant,
Elise

Tragedy and Triumph

I live in a very small town, only 7,000 in my whole county. Today, our community suffered a great tragedy. A van carrying a family of 12 passengers, traveling to celebrate a wedding, was hit by a semi. Ten of the twelve passengers, one a baby just a few months old, are dead. The only survivors, two little boys, now will grow up without their parents. The driver of the semi was killed as well, and somewhere in Alabama his family is mourning him too.

The family was part of the Mennonite community. All morning long I've been looking at my son and tearing up. I cannot begin to imagine the depth of loss that will be felt by those boys, and by everyone in their close community.

So much loss that seems, to us, so senseless. All I can say, and what I have been saying all morning, is that none of this took God by surprise. He knew it was coming, and therefore, He has already prepared a way.

There will be people who misread what I am trying to say. If God knew this was going to happen then why didn't He stop it, right? We live in a world where everyone makes choices and those choices affect us and everyone around us. I do not, and probably never will, know why so many tragic things happen. What I do know...what I know beyond any fear or doubt that might try to assail me, is that God remains in control, despite where any human choices lead.

As I prepare to celebrate with my family the death and resurrection, the sacrifice and victory, of my Savior, I rejoice for these who are now in His presence. I await His promise to turn all things to good for those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose.

Look at this picture of me and my baby...so many moments like this that I take for granted...when I look at my son and my eyes fill with tears, imagining two little boys who have lost both mother and father, I remember that no one ever could or will love them more than God, our heavenly Father.

Thanks for reading my ramblings...please remember to pray for the community of those killed this morning. Please pray for their two small boys, and please pray that our community at large will know how to reach out to them, and how to support them.

God is sovereign. God is faithful. We are His hands and feet...

What Is Greatness?

In C.S. Lewis book The Great Divorce there is a scene that has affected me and inspired me ever since I read it, probably over ten years ago now.

A man is sitting quietly with his mentor at the base of a mountain which is meant to signify Heaven. As they sit a glorious procession begins. Pomp and circumstance and celebration surround the arrival of a single woman. The man struggles to see her and then asks his mentor who the jubilation honors.

His teacher replies that she is no one the man ever will have heard of but the young man insists that surely she is famous for no where else has he seen such ado about a single soul.

His teacher then explains that she was no one to others on earth, while she lived, a poor widowed woman living in a humble home. But she always had room for those in need of shelter and she always had food to share with the hungry. She faithfully served others, living her life as God's hand and feet. Though on earth her life seemed unremarkable, in Heaven she received the greatest honor one can boast.

What do You want from me, Lord? Where should I go from here?

I want to make a difference for Your kingdom. I want to BE who You desire me to be.

Show me the path of my life, Lord. Help me to stop being so self-seeking and self-serving. Teach me to love and serve. I don't need to be great but I do have a deep need to do great things. I need to do Your will, follow Your ways, be Your hands and feet. What could be greater than that?

I need to stop desiring greatness and instead, become great.

"...but the one who is the greatest among you must become like the youngest, and the leader like the servant." Luke 22:26

Are You Kidding Me?

I'm telling this story for all of the stay-at-home, work-your-fanny-off Moms.

The other night my son was happily playing by himself with his cars while my husband and I each sat reading books. We were all in the same room and intermittently interacted with one another but for the most part we were all just having a relaxing evening passed as we each chose.

My husband looked up at me and asked, "So, is this what you do every day?"

In my head I said, "Excuse me? I think I just hallucinated...what did you ask me?"

Out loud I said, "Excuse me? I think I just hallucinated...what did you ask me?" Yeah, there was no stopping the immediate thought right then. It wasn't my most eloquent moment.

My husband had the sweetest smile on his face and he said once again, "Does he just play like this all day?"

This is where a Vulcan mind-meld would come in handy because the words I could find were so inadequate to the extreme that I just looked at him and said, "Uh...no."

This is the eternal question we find ourselves answering again and again, to our spouses, our friends, our family, our acquaintances, and if any of you are like me, to ourselves.

No I don't just sit on my tail reading all day while my son takes care of himself! That was the first time I've read between the hours of 7:00 AM and 9:00 PM for over two months!

I sit and play cars. I sit and do puzzles. I sit and color. I sit and play blocks. I sit and play legos. I sit and read books...HIS books. I take him to the potty and then sit in the bathroom and read his books again...and again and again. We wash the dishes together and put them away together. We do the laundry together and dust together. We cook together. We learn letters together and sing songs together. There are somewhere in the ballpark of 4,062 things he could do that he loves to do in this house but they are just no fun unless Mommy is doing them too.

This can't just be me, right? You find something your child loves and you feel a moment of intense liberation. "Now I will have at least twenty minutes to do something while he is happily playing!" Then the sweetest voice I know rings out like an alarm clock waking me from a blissfully relaxing dream.

"Mommy, color too...Mommy, paint too...Mommy, cars too...Mommy, uppy-days*...Mommy, moe-knees+...Mommy...snack...etc.,etc.,etc."

There is no going to the bathroom alone or eating alone or sitting alone or standing alone or cooking alone or cleaning alone or relaxing alone. There is Noble and Mommy, a dynamic duo.

There are times when this is frustrating, of course, because I was an individual for 30 years, able to do whatever I chose whenever I chose. However, the reward comes when my husband notices.

"You know, Elise, you're always saying hoe smart Noble is, but he learns everything from you. You're the reason he's learning so much."

You mean he's not teaching himself while I sit on my sofa curled up with a cup of coffee and a book?...huh. Who knew?

* uppy-days - Up (This is his interpretation of "The people on the bus go up and down." He learned them together and still uses the whole phrase for "up."

+moe-knees - "milkies" our family's covert name for nursing

Finding Freedom in the Middle of Nowhere

"Elise, you had a great job that you loved in the greatest city in the world, why did you leave it all behind to move to the best kept secret in Kentucky?" Well, the truth is, sometimes I have no idea.

I had a dream job in Manhattan, doing something I was good at and believed in, working alongside wonderful people. My boss believed in me and encouraged me. He was ready to keep pushing me forward and letting me succeed and I was excited about the future career and opportunities I had with that organization.

The City was perfect for me. I thrived on the energy and the opportunities. I loved that everything I could ever want was available to me. (Ah, how I miss Ethiopian cuisine!) In the midst of this amazing life experience, the elusive dream my husband and I had long desired came true. We had a baby!

At my husband's suggestion (and with my enthusiastic support) we packed up the bags and headed out of NYC. Can you raise a baby in New York? Of course! Could we raise our child(ren) the way we wanted to in New York? Questionable...not impossible but definitely improbable. We left the City behind and moved to a county of 7,000. Goodbye Metropolis, hello Mayberry.

Leaving behind New York City and its infinite promise and possibility, we took a chance on our dreams for our family, and here, in this small town I have found a freedom that New York never could have given me. I have found that some of my dreams really weren't such a big deal after all...nothing makes you feel more important than being the center of your baby's world. No achievement compares to my husband thanking me for taking such good care of him and our baby. That is success...the only success that matters.

New York has a lot to offer and I still miss it all the time, but as far as I'm concerned, Kentucky has a corner on the Freedom market.

Escaping From Prison

Acts 16:25-30
²⁵But at midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the prisoners were listening to them. ²⁶Suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken; and immediately all the doors were opened and everyone's chains were loosed. ²⁷And the keeper of the prison, awaking from sleep and seeing the prison doors open, supposing the prisoners had fled, drew his sword and was about to kill himself. ²⁸But Paul called with a loud voice, saying, "Do yourself no harm, for we are all here." ²⁹Then he called for a light, ran in, and fell down trembling before Paul and Silas. ³⁰And he brought them out and said, "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?""

In the scripture above we read that the chains and walls that imprisoned Paul and Silas were broken when they worshiped God, and this is something I have often heard taught. We ought to praise God under all circumstances and in all places for He is more than able to come to our rescue. However, there is an interesting aside to this story that I have never specifically heard taught.

If the scene above had been written for a Hollywood movie then the chains would have broken, the walls come down, and Paul and Silas would have quickly and quietly snuck away to their smuggled freedom. They would no longer be confined but they would have remained fugitives.

However, Hollywood didn't write the story, God did. In His perfect version, Paul and Silas stayed, despite the opportunity for freedom, and a man and his entire household were saved through their testimony.

What can we learn from this? When I find myself in a prison situation, a season when I feel trapped with no way out. A scenario where I have been falsely accused and/or even convicted of crimes I did not commit. Or, like Paul and Silas, perhaps I am indeed guilty of that which they accuse me, but the action was not wrong. What do I do? Do I sit in my isolation and weep, "Why, God? Why?" Or do I choose to praise Him in the midst of my darkness?

Let's assume for the sake of continuing that I have made the better choice. I have praised God from the depth of my despair and He has heard my cries for help. The doors to my proverbial cell swing open and God whispers, "You are free to leave, my child, but if you choose to stay you will be a part of something amazing."

That is the great challenge. When I have been accused, and imprisoned. When evil people say hateful things against me. When the very deck of my life seems stacked against me God offers me freedom, but asks for my sacrifice. Then the question becomes, "How far will you follow me, My child?" I stand in my cell at the edge of my open door, ready to run when again His voice whispers, "How much of yourself are you willing to give for My sake?"

If I choose to make a run for it, He cannot be angry. After all, it is a freedom He, Himself granted. In fact, many of us would run out the doors glorifying God for His faithfulness. But if I am willing to be still and trust Him, might He use me to accomplish something even more miraculous? What might happen if I am willing to lay my own interests aside and wait for Him, despite my own discomfort?

In the story above, not only was the prison guard saved, along with every member of his household, but Paul and Silas were set free as truly free men, not fugitives who had miraculously broken their bonds. If I will only wait and listen for Him, might God do more for me than tear down a few walls? If I will take a chance based on my confidence in Him, if I will surrender to His will over my own fears and preferences, might He tear down those walls and then use me to begin to rebuild beyond my greatest expectation?

This is a valuable lesson for me, and I believe I am not so very different than anyone else. Too often I seek whatever will bring me comfort and make me happy, but my perception is off. I see such a small corner of the larger picture He is painting. Oh if I will only be content to wait for Him, what might He be able to do in and through me!

Freaked Out Blessedness

I realize that it has been far too long since my last post and I cannot thank enough those people who enjoy my blog enough to contact me and tell me you've missed it. Our beautiful life has been a bit of a multi-tasking circus and I've been the Ring Master trying to juggle all the acts. This brings me to today's inspiration.

While chatting with a friend who is praying about some choices in her life she said she feels a bit "freaked out" by the possible changes. I laughed, knowing well the feeling, and then replied that I live in a perpetual state of "freaked out blessedness."

My son brings so much joy into my life, and into our family. He makes me laugh and he makes my heart flutter. But with all of this joy and energy comes the greatest responsibility I've ever had. That responsibility can seem incredibly daunting. This little life is waiting to be shaped. He is looking to me to teach him, train him, and enable him to succeed. It is a tremendous honor and a heavy burden. But, God promises that His yoke is easy and His burden is light, and He has called me to shape, teach, train, and enable this little man so that can only mean that He will carry me through.

A few months ago I was beginning to pray for and about my family. I was deciding what to pray for and about and as I thought through the various possibilities I realized something quite simple that has revolutionized my thinking. It was simple, and apparently I've been missing it for years.

Why am I so concerned about praying for more children but not too many children? I have a boy now, should I pray for a brother to be his playmate or a sister to "complete" our family. (Isn't that part of the American dream?) It all sounds so ridiculous as I type these words, but this is exactly what I've done throughout my life on any number of subjects. I decide what I believe is best for me and then I pray for God to make it happen.

On the aforementioned night, that changed. If God wills me to have a child every two years for as long as I'm able, probably totalling about eight, then I need to pray that God gives me patience; that He helps me to find and hold on to peace amidst the sometimes chaos that surely would frequent our home; that He enables me to always make my husband my top priority, never neglecting that most important relationship. What is, on the other hand, my son was a singularly wonderful gift from God? If he is the only child that God grants us biologically then I need to pray that I use my time wisely, for surely I will have more of it than the mother He grants many children. I need to pray for contentment with the beautiful child He has already given me. I need to pray that I find my fulfillment in Him, not in my family.

Don't you see? It has nothing to do with what I want or desire or prefer. My prayer has become "God help me to become the woman that I need to be in order to walk out the path that You've laid before me. Help me to be who You've created me to be."

Jesus prayed "I have brought you glory on earth by completing the work you gave me to do." (John 17:4)

Let me live my life able to say the same when my years have ended. Let me not claim that I have done everything I ever wanted to do, or that my plans have succeeded. Let me live my life and finally declare that I have brought God glory on earth by completing the work He gave me to do, by becoming the creation He always intended me to be.

So, there are moments when more children seems perfect, and there are moments when I can hardly manage the one I have. God knows that. He also knows exactly what I am truly capable of.

After almost six years of marriage, I still get butterflies in my stomach when I hear my husband pull into the driveway after being away at work. He still makes my heart pound. For no reason whatsoever, my little boy runs up to me from behind and wraps his arms around me, squeezing me tightly. I am, indeed, blessed to be living this life.

Maybe I'm supposed to be a little freaked out. It keeps my eyes on Him.